“Oh, I know, I know I did not just see Jasmine Crockett get up there and say that Trump, the President of the United States, the Commander in Chief over our military— I didn’t know, I know!”** the roast began, sparking laughter across social media.
The speaker, having none of Crockett’s over-the-top claims, didn’t hold back. “Girl, you need to go sit your self-righteous, spotlight-chasing, Constitution-ignoring behind all the way down. You ain’t commanding nothing! That bad wig and a Twitter account, maybe!” they fired back, taking a jab at both Crockett’s political position and her public persona.

“Jasmine, honey, the last time I checked, he didn’t declare war, okay? He didn’t launch World War III. He just made a precision strike, legally. Go read the War Powers Act, sister,” the voice continued, further roasting Crockett’s misunderstanding of presidential powers in times of conflict.

The takedown was just getting started: “Girl, he don’t need your signature. He don’t need your whiny little approval, okay? Well, you’re more delulu than I thought you were. You are cuckoo for some Cocoa Puffs, alright?”

As the roast continued, it delved deeper into the absurdity of Crockett’s position. “If you honestly think that our President is going to stop mid-air strike and be like, ‘Ah, crap! I gotta go holla at Jasmine before I defend this country,’ girl, bye!” the speaker added, throwing shade at Crockett’s misplaced sense of self-importance.

The commentary then took a sharp, more serious turn, pointing out that while Crockett seemed more concerned with her own feelings, American troops were actively engaged in missions overseas. “Girl, he ain’t out here DoorDashing dinner. He’s out here protecting American lives,” the speaker stated. “The fact that you’re out here more worried about your precious little feelings than our men and women in uniform that are overseas bobbing and weaving these missiles tells me everything I need to know and that I already knew about you, girlfriend.”

The roast ended with a final, cutting piece of advice: “So here’s some advice for you, Jasmine, okay? I’m gonna hold your hand when I say this, alright, sweetheart. If you want a man to come ask you for permission before he takes charge, download Bumble. So until then, stay in your own daggum lane, bless your heart, and keep America’s name out of your mouth if you can’t respect the ones that are protecting it. Okay?”

The Reaction: A Viral Moment

Naturally, the internet exploded in laughter after the roast was shared, with many agreeing that Crockett’s comments about military authority were out of touch and, at best, naïve. Hashtags like #JasmineCrockettRoast and #GirlBye began trending across Twitter, as people celebrated the roast’s witty humor and sharp truths about Crockett’s political overreach.

Supporters of the speaker, in particular, applauded the fierce response to Crockett’s misplaced entitlement. “Jasmine Crockett just got served! This is how you handle someone who thinks they can overstep,” one user tweeted, while another added, “Jasmine, go read the Constitution, then maybe we’ll take you seriously.”

A Lesson in Accountability and Respect

In the end, this viral moment became a reminder of the importance of understanding the boundaries of political discourse, especially when discussing the military and the executive branch’s power. The roast exposed just how out of touch Crockett was with the role she was trying to play and reinforced the importance of respecting the systems of government that ensure the safety and security of all Americans.

For Jasmine Crockett, this confrontation likely won’t be the last time she faces scrutiny. The viral roast shows just how powerful social media has become as a platform for holding public figures accountable—and how quickly moments of political theater can be flipped into viral moments of reflection and self-awareness.